September 06, 2006

Hardcore Butch vs. Lipstick Lezbo

I often wonder what makes a gay woman become butch. One could argue that from birth they didn't feel feminine like their little friends. Instead of playing with dolls, they wanted to play with Tonka trucks and ride BMX bikes with the boys.

After my first few experiences cruising
Craigslist, I soon realized that I'd be instantly connected to all TYPES of women. You've got the pretty girls that like to call themselves "FEMMES"...those are the ladies that look like Me. And then you've got those OTHER girls that like to look like BOYS. No, I'm not calling myself pretty, but I'm calling myself ultra feminine. I'm a girlie girl. I like all things pretty and pink just happens to be my favorite color. I will choose a cute pair of Manolo's over a dusty pair of hiking boots (or whatever it is those other women wear).

I don't really discriminate when I'm on the prowl. I don't care about skin color, although size matters. I'm of average height (5'7 on my flat feet), so clearly I wouldn't want someone 5'2 and 180 pounds. How awkward would THAT be? It goes without saying that I'm not interested in a BBW (big beautiful woman) because that term is often confused with "thick" or "curvy". Those words in ANY combination can be misleading. I'm not rail thin, but I'm not big either. After you have a baby, Mother Nature blesses you with what I like to call "Womanly Curves". So that's what I've got, Womanly Curves.

If you're not really specific in the ads you place on Craigslist, you can get a number of odd responses that you'd probably want to avoid all together. I've never considered myself to be attracted to a butch type of woman. I already have a man, why would I want a WOMAN who looks and acts like a MAN? I prefer a prettier, softer version. I would prefer to deal with a woman who sort of looks like me. Someone stylish, but not too conservative. Someone with a great smile who knows how to properly apply her cosmetics. I can't tell you how many women really don't know how to apply their own make-up! The summer I worked at Nordstrom after high school really paid off!

The problem with ultra feminine women like myself is that they just want to be pleased. Call it selfish, but it's true. I just troll Craigslist to find someone willing to go down on me (and do it well). Oddly you can't begin to imagine all the women who are only interested in doing JUST THAT. I'm not sure if I'd be so willing to go down on some woman that I don't know. So I have to lay down rules when I'm engaging in these conversations - which are borderline like negotiations for NSA (no strings attached) sex. Plus I often question how do two ultra feminine women relate to one another regarding sex. It must be awful hard to get pleased without having to be the pleasER at some point.

The one thing that I've found odd about butch women is that they look hard, but they're probably more sensitive than I am. I met one woman online and we talked a few times on the phone. She described herself as being really pretty in the face, but had a shaved head and basically lived her life like a man. She dressed like a man, acted like a man, thought she was a man. The problem I found is that whenever we spoke and I stepped out of SUPER GIRLIE MODE, she got weird on me. She actually told me to never call her again because she thought I was too HARD. Me? HARD? Give me a break! How can call yourself butch and be more sensitive than the average woman? Hey...BE A MAN ABOUT IT! Ha!

Even my peg leg friend Cate spoke words of after sex snuggling. Sorry, I'm not interested in your sensitivity. Hmmm...maybe I AM too hard.

I think I'm going to try an experiment. Maybe I'll post an ad posing as a butch girl looking for a soft hottie FEMME! I'll even post some of the responses. This is going to be GREAT! See you on Craigslist!

Thanks for reading.


Blogger P said...


So. . .

You're not a carpet muncher, more like a 68 I owe you one, chick?

September 06, 2006 1:20 PM  
Blogger J. G. said...

Damn your crazy but I can't wait to see the posts!!! LOL on peg leg your so wrong!!!

September 06, 2006 1:23 PM  
Blogger Nika Laqui said...

No comment....but this was a great read...can't wait to see the results from the experiment...

September 06, 2006 1:27 PM  
Blogger Peace said...

Damn, I hope you don't respond to MY ad! Ha! Just kidding! Looking forward to the experiment, sounds fun! :)

September 06, 2006 1:46 PM  
Blogger P said...

@ Peace:

You a phreak? - In the fuzz bumper sense?

September 06, 2006 2:18 PM  
Blogger Peace said...

Not quite in THAT sense! WHY you curious P? Hahahaha!

September 06, 2006 3:55 PM  
Anonymous Koolbreeze said...

damn Peace you got an ad?!?!?
P you are crazy. where do you come up with those names.

Carrie~~~why she gotta be your peg leg friend??? that is so wrong! LOL

September 07, 2006 1:33 PM  

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